Anyway, I've realised how we can beat the energy crisis. Or at least lessen its severity.
We use gyms. The ones where people go just to work out, run on a treadmill. Why don't we use the kinetic energy they produce, to provide energy? It might even be enough to power the gym itself, helping us cut down on the energy feed to the thousands of exercise facilities.
The idea is that if people are just leveling up their physical stats, I mean, exercising, they're basically wasting the energy that they're burning from the foods which they consume. So if we simply install dynamos into every treadmill... We can effectively convert a sizable proportion of what would have been wasted energy, into electrical energy!
When I asked one of my primary school friends about this, he mentioned something about people not being able to produce that much electricity in a short time. I'm not entirely sure of the exact amount of energy that could be produced by a human running on a treadmill, but I'm sure it'd be enough to power some fluorescent tubes. Even if we wanted to extend the power generation to the more energy consuming appliances(Like Air-Conditioning), we could just put a requirement on how long a person has to use the gym facilities before he leaves.
On that phone conversation, I said "well we'll just keep them in for six hours or something." To which he responded "Then they'll die of exhaustion!"
So I came back to my original idea for solving the energy crisis: Burn their corpses as fuel.
Come on, it makes perfect sense. If Man really wants to aim for maximum energy recycling, we're going to have to start recycling ourselves.
... This brings me to another idea involving suicide booths. There are a lot of people trying to die out there... So we could make some money out of it if we wanted to. In the cartoon series Futurama, a company named Stop & Drop made a whole bunch of these cubicles on the streets of New New York. That's the new... New York. Well, these things could really provide us with a ready supply of cadavers to use as fuel. Not only would we have less people to consume energy, we would also have more people to provide us with energy. Brilliant!
Okay, okay. Here's one that doesn't involve killing people. In the near future, we'll be able to build cryogenic sleep chambers. They would be these tubey thingies that drop your body temperature so low, that you fall into cryogenic sleep. In this state you would not need to eat or drink. Your body is essentially a statue.
With a small maintenance crew to ensure that the sleep process doesn't go wrong, we could remain in this state for millions of years, until our fossil fuel sources are replenished.
Where are we going to get the energy to do this in the first place...? Good question. I don't know yet, but it will probably involve maximising our stored energy first...
And behold, the Solar Flashlight!
-Joe